Friday, January 5, 2018

Black women's laughter


Day 4 in Hampton Virginia, there's snow, but the Sun is shining which is delightful. I have all I need to prepare me some Udon Soup.
Since I am off work I decided to pay bills, yes yes, but I am grateful...
There was a glitch on the computer it didn't take the account number. So after several tries, I finally had to call.. which I was trying to AVOID because I really didn't wanna talk with anybody, BUT I failed.
So a sister answered the phone, I could tell she had a piece of candy or something in her mouth, I didn't ask which I normally would do, but instead I proceed to explain to her what happened and she decided sucking on that candy that she didn't wanna hear all that and asked me to provide the information and she'd collect the payment over the phone.
She wanted my full name as it is on the account and she seemed to not understand me when I kept spelling out my maiden name, we did it four times and by this time Ora D's baby girl is tired of repeating herself so being who I am, in my Alabama dialect I said,
"Look a hen, it's like not just one, but a WHOLE BUNCH OF Y'ALL. enough to make a Tarzan Movie with S instead of an N." (A Sanford & Son Red Foxx quote)
She Hollarded and got choked on whatever that was in her mouth. It was serious for a moment, but she was able to regain her composure ...somewhat
She and I had a good laugh she told me "You are going to get me into trouble for laughing so loud, but that was definitely not expected." I apologized and told her to blame it on my Asperger
She laughed at that too. hell, I started laughing at myself too which is not difficult for me to do anyway, but her laughter was so light hearted and healing. It felt as if both of us received a release in that moment of laughter. Then she said, "I apologize because you know what? I definitely didn't get it until you said it like that and that's a shame." I told her I was cool with it and added that the reason she got is that she's lived long enough She ALREADY know the deal. She agreed and we laughed some more.
Being the story teller that I am of my surreal life, I shared with her my voting experience in Arizona where I gave the old white lady my driver's license and she acted like she didn't see the S and almost called me the N, but was interrupted by the old nice white man who was training her and who became so red faced, he was profusely apologizing and repeating my maiden over to assure me HE KNEW what it was.
This Sister laughed out loud again. She said, "OMG, you are really going to get me in trouble." Me and my anxiety got anxious because we were talking like old friends so I told her that if she does get in trouble to have her supervisor call me. She thanked me for the laugh, she said, " I really do appreciate your laughter too, I needed this today. Thank you"
The phone call ended. Simple and Sweet, but so full for what I needed today as well.
BTW
My maiden name is SIGGERS ðŸ˜‚💕😊😜

Human Connecting to Human


I relocated to Virginia a few days over a year ago and my experience here has not panned out as I had desired.I seriously didn't think I would be here at this time, but fate has it that I am still here.
So I experienced Day 1 in 2018 here in Hampton Virginia and while my heart longed for the people who are not present with me, I made the first day of 2018 a day of just gratefulness. I cooked the black-eyed peas, collard greens, candied yams which are an Alabama traditional New Year's Day meal. I spent time on Facebook a space that I have returned to as I cannot seem to find my tribe of people in real time. I am able to connect with souls similar to mine from all around the globe. I chatted with my daughter and cried over my still estranged son and soul friend. Overall it was a good day. On day 2 I awakened to the thought that  
I have some surreal experiences. On this particular morning as I was waking up I could hear voices of people cheering me on. I thought for a moment , "Now either I can think those were the voices of my ancestors or my own strong constitution, either way my survival is enhanced."  The day was decent, but later in the day I thought, since I am back on Facebook why not document my successes failures, moments of the year 2018 each day while I remain here. So the following day I began documenting. Today it came to me as I was perusing an old friend's blog that instead of Facebook, I could publish this journal of my experience here instead. So  even though today is my Day 5 and I am including the posts from the the other days as today is my first official day to  blog which was suggested to me over the past two weeks, really more than four years. So this is the first cut and paste starting with this experience.


Day 3 Rebel Flag Encounter ðŸ˜‚😂
I live a surreal life. So my Subaru started smoking today while I was out and about. I was able to make it to a location and called my insurance company to provide road service. It is cold as Fk but I was not far from where someone I knew lived and fortunately I had a place to get warm. So the tow truck guy calls informing me that he is five minutes away. I get off the phone with him. I told the person with whom I was waiting, "He sounds like Jack the Ripper." to which she became concerned that I was willing to go meet him, but she has no idea how many Jack the Rippers with whom I've come in contact. I assured her, I'd be fine. So I go down and within a couple of minutes there he is, tall White Young man all camouflaged out including this camouflaged cap unashamedly broadcasting this great big RED & BLUE THE SOUTH SHALL RISE AGAIN Rebel Flag.. 
Yup, this is MY LIFE. I can tell instantly he wants no part of me, but I am being me regardless of the Rebel Flag. Shit! I am Rebel Flag Whisperer at this point in my life. 
He looks annoyed because of where I was parked, but I tried to appease his frustration by telling him I could move it so he can get it on the truck. He's looking at me like I'm a nut, as I proceed to get into the Subaru, he stops me and said, "No, you don't have to do that, I'll get it." So he did. 
I was waiting shivering outside in the cold with him and after a few minutes he insisted that I get inside the tow vehicle, but it wasn't until he was almost done, I got inside as I didn't want this Rebel flag person accusing me of stealing as I knew from the looks of him, he had me stereotyped.
When I got into the truck, what was playing? Yup a type of genre of music that's my Jam.. Country Music a song from back in the day Randy Travis, I'm going to love you forever and ever" Shocking my Rebel Flag companion. I started singing and he laughed.He's looking stunned so I inform him I originated in Alabama one traffic light town had a graduating class of 64 where we only had two radio stations, three tv channels, and could only get Tuskegee's Black station and ABC station when it rained. 
I talked with him about fishing and cooking fish by the river banks, swimming in the creek, playhouses in trees in the woods, my fear of walking train trestle but it was the only way to the good fishing hole. My dad hunting rabbit coon possum, deer meat, and beaver. He was impressed. I was speaking his language. He asked me if I knew of the Andy Griffith Show. I informed him we watched Andy Griffith Show every Sunday morning when my dad would cook his smorgasbord breakfast consisting of rabbit or squirrel gravy and rice, thick pork sausages, fried chicken, grits, thick slab of bacon and the BEST BISCUITS a soul could eat. He told me how Hungry he was and that he wished he'd lived that life. Then it happened.
This young man 24 years of age same age as my son started to share his life with me, I know all about the wife, the trouble they've had how they moved to Florida and after six months she told him she wanted to return to Virginia and because he loved her so much he came back here. He talked about wanting to explore the world more. I know they are struggling financially as well as he was like putty on counselor's couch.I listened to him, gave him my clinical perspective encouraged him to engage other places, people, and applauded him on loving his wife as well as his fine work ethic which he was indeed proud of. I poured into him the things that I would have hoped someone would do for my son. 
When we finally made it to my place, I handed him a tip and he was totally shocked and again kept saying, you really don't have to do this to which I responded, "I know, but this is who I AM." For a moment, I thought this Rebel flag companion of mine wanted a hug, it was awkward, but not unfamiliar to me. He kept telling me to be safe and don't get out in the snow if I didn't have to and so on and so forth. I smiled, he was uncomfortable in that moment because this young man really wanted a hug. I patted his shoulder, thanked him, and I told him any mother would be proud of such a respectful young man. He Smiled. 

So there you go.... A day in the life of Carol Snow